Monday, December 29, 2008

The 5th Wheel. A lament.

I've noticed a disturbing trend. I’ll refer to it as the Coupling Effect. Boy meets girl. Girl falls in love with boy. Boy and girl decide to go on lots of couple dates with their other couple friends and leave their fabulous single friends to miss them desperately. Don't get me wrong, I am quite happy when friends become involved in loving and happy relationships, but where does that leave me? And yes, before we go any further, it's always, always about me.

I am completely satisfied with my current state, sure I sometimes miss the big spoon to my little one. But I have pretty much the most awesome collection of friends any one person could ever have. I'm never at a loss for someone to laugh, dance, be completely inappropriate with or someone to completely inappropriately dance with. Now here's my concern. As one of the dwindling singlers of the group, I find myself excluded ever so slightly in favor of The Couple Dates. True, this is a completely unfounded and petty jealousy, but I fear that one night while all my couple friends are on their respective dates with my other couple friends, I will be left alone knitting booties for my cats and the next thing you know…BAM I'm 50, have created a permanent buttock imprint on my couch, and emit the faint aroma of cheese.

So, I’ll ask you. What is the draw of the couple date? I don't think I was ever on one that I enjoyed in all of my relationshiped time. I always felt like it was leading to some awkward moment where we start placing keys in a bowl and hoping for the best. Maybe couples just feel comfortable around other couples because they have transcended beyond the life we singles lead (perusing missed connections on a daily basis in the off chance that someone I drunkenly bumped into the previous night thought I was hot.)

I digress.

I’ll leave you with this. If you are a couple, don't leave your singles out to dry. Take us out. Play with us. We need your love most of all.


Anonymous said...

I also have noticed this disturbing trend. Its good to bring awareness.

Passionista said...

I must admit, I'm a part of a couple who likes dates with other couples. I've never been this breed until this relationship I'm in. It's just a different kind of fun to go on couple dates. Something you can do together and still enjoy other people. I definitely don't leave my single friends out, but sometimes they think they will be the third wheel.

Anonymous said...

great time to get a couple

Anonymous said...

You become the other. You are the other. It is NOT a trend. Suck it up and find other singles. We need you!

Anonymous said...

The coupling becomes even more rampant when they have kids. You'll never see them again.

nicole said...

i like your writing. i enjoy couples dates bc i get to girl talk w the girls and my bf can hang with the boys, but i still feel like i hung out w my bf. its getting the best of both worlds! if there was a single there i would it would be fine because we are not split as couples but by gender...i just worry there would be a few moments where she would feel wheely.

Anonymous said...

You are so right! Thanks for talking about this issue honestly. Girlfriends need to realize that just because they've found a guy doesn't mean it's time to dump their single friends. I don't have an issue going out with couples but its seems like once they're together they don't even consider inviting a single to join them. That really hurts.

Me said...

Hey people,

I've been pretty bad with posting here. I just started another blog following my dating misadventures if you're still interested.